Broken Convenant

The mountains might shake. The hills might be removed. But my faithful love for you will never be shaken. And my covenant that promises peace to you will never be broken," says the Lord. He shows you his loving concern. Isaiah 54:9-11

"God wants me to be happy". "I prayed about it and I felt peace to leave my spouse." "I have done all I have and now I have to take care of my own needs". "I no longer feel love for my spouse." "God wants me to be happy."  These are just some of the explanations I have heard over the years to justify divorce. Notice the selfish thinking that goes into those statements.  It is all about the their happiness. There is no consideration for the well being for the children in this soon to be broken family.

My heart breaks every time I hear about a pending divorce of a couple we know in our church. Our Church!  Christians should be the most put together group of people in the world because of what Christ does in their lives, but sadly they are not.  On a monthly basis there are just as many Christian's throwing in the towel on their marriages as non-Christian's. Sadly, Christian children coming out of broken homes suffer some of the same problems as non Christian children: abandonment, alcohol/drug abuse, promiscuity, legal problems, school problems and the list goes on.

Parents who venture down the divorce pathway seriously wreck their families finances.  Money which would help with the well being of their children are now going into the hands of legal representation of both spouses. Not just one attorney, but two attorneys must be paid. Once the money is gone the custodial parent must apply for county assistance to feed their family.  Society is paying a heavy price because now they must create social programs to address the problem of divorce.

Every time a Christian couple divorces it has serious ramifications for the Church. Whereas you once had a great relationship with a couple, when they divorce this couple pulls away from all of their former friends and they take their children out their Sunday school classes in that church.  Divorce begins to effect the cohesiveness of the Adult Sunday school class when couples who regularly attended no longer attend. Relationships are broken when divorced couples no longer return phone calls from former friends.

Children begin to blame themselves for their parents divorce by blaming their own existence for their parents pain. As children enter adolescence with all of it's gyrating hormones children continue to place blame on themselves for why mom or dad are no longer in their lives. Because so much energy is spent dwelling on their emotions little energy is left for them to focus on doing well in school. Teachers struggle to reach these kids because every teaching method they use doesn't seem to help them. These children are then sent to the school psychologist who give them a label so they can get special education help for what ails them.. Little do they know that it was simply a broken heart that created those problems.

When divorce happens these children are thrust into survival mode where drugs and alcohol become the norm.  When their grades slip and these kids begin to lose interest in school they begin skipping classes and hanging out all day with the wrong crowd. One of their friends says something on the dare and the group decides to do a risk taking activity which brings law enforcement into the picture.

As these negative behaviors continue these children grow into very angry adults who will do anything to get rid of the feeling of abandonment and failure. Society pays a very heavy price for those parental statements of "I just want to be happy."  Just for once I would like to see parents who make those statements of I just want to be happy to think ahead at the possible repercussions their divorce would have on their kids and then instead of calling 1-800-divorce they call a recommended marriage therapist to help them put their marriage together again. Your children's future may be at stake.