Bereavement and Coping Strategies

Everyone at some point in their lives will experience the loss of a loved one. As much as we would like to be convinced that everything will work out grief will still be a very painful process for everyone going through it. Grief is made more difficult when one considers that everyone grieves in very different ways and with that in mind it is important to be patient with those around us.  Some will try to use humor to make themselves feel better. Others will have a need to cry endlessly to let go of the pain of their grief.  Still others will bury themselves in work. As one person commented, just stuff those feelings way down to the bottom of the bottle and put a cork in it.

Grief is a painful process that requires good competent grief counseling.  Since our loss I had been involved in two Grief Share groups and in both cases the group were made up of woman.  Men will typically not attend grief support partly because they see grief as a character weakness.  The reality is recovery is only possible when men seek help when feelings of depression, sadness and unanswered questions such as the why did this happen or why didn't God keep my loved one alive.

When people do not deal with the grief these feelings have a tendency to take on physical symptoms: chest pains, sleeplessness, panic attacks and the list goes on.  In some cases these bodily symptoms can result in a diagnosis of cancer.  These experiences can be associated with several adverse outcomes, including an increased risk for premature death. Mortikainen found a 50%-150% excess mortality from accidental, violent, and alcohol-related causes as well as a 20%-35% excess mortality from ischemic heart disease within 5 years of the death of a spouse, and this association has also been documented in other chronic illnesses.[2,3] Moreover, grief and bereavement are linked with increased rates of suicide and suicide attempts. the researchers learned in one such study.  This research should convince us of the necessity to work on our grief.

This video touches on excellent coping strategies to help someone experiencing loss to get through their pain. I hope you take the time to watch it.
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