When we look at our own families pattern of dysfunction we must remember that when Jesus was born into the world it was not through nobility or purple linens, but through a simple working class family. He is the hope for all of us that healing from our past wounds is possible.

Now in those days a decree went out from Caesar Augustus, that a census be taken of all [a]the inhabited earth. 2 [b]This was the first census taken while[c]Quirinius was governor of Syria. 3 And everyone was on his way to register for the census, each to his own city. 4 Joseph also went up from Galilee, from the city of Nazareth, to Judea, to the city of David which is called Bethlehem, because he was of the house and family of David, 5 in order to register along with Mary, who was engaged to him, and was with child. 6 While they were there, the days were completed for her to give birth. 7 And she gave birth to her firstborn son; and she wrapped Him in cloths, and laid Him in a [d]manger, because there was no room for them in the inn.

I was reflecting on the displaced families over this holiday time of year. Divorces, death, gambling addictions leading to homelessness often leads children down a wrong way path of insecurity and instability.

 I was remembering that it was the sudden death of my dad's mom when he was just a little baby that caused his dad to have a severe reaction to his 'battle fatigue or today's version we otherwise think of PTSD.  Dad was just a baby when his mom and dad lived in a home in Farmington, Minnesota when his mom, Cora, died.  His dad had been a woodworker when life came to a screeching halt when he was unable to function. 

His dad, Levi, wound up in the St. Cloud Veteran's home when he was unable to continue making a living and take care of his son's  Frank, and his brother Roger was taken in by his mom's family in Robbinsdale, Minnesota. They lived a life of insecurity and instability and were taught that the only way of recovering from the emotional pain of loss would be to work hard and do well in school. Emotions became secondary in their lives. When dad entered the service when World War two broke out that work ethic was reinforced.

I began to reflect on the time of Jesus's birth and the upheaval of that time when King Harrod sent an order to kill every firstborn child 2 years old and younger and the emotional upheaval it caused for all families of that era.

Baby Jesus came into the world in a path of insecurity and instability when the only place Joseph could find for this new born's birth was a relatively dirty feeding trough behind the inn. Like my dad's dad, Joseph was also a woodworker with a reputation of working hard. 

 To think that God could have chosen to bring his son into the world through nobility and purple linens and yet he chose a simple working-class family to bring the Savior of the world is incomprehensible to any human mind, but as we read the words from Matthew to John we see that there was a reason to that madness.

Today, there are many families that are wrecked with dysfunction caused by divorce and utter chaos that need the hope of the living Savior to breathe on them  Everyone needs the savior to breathe life into them to renew and refresh their aching souls which have been wreck by dysfunction that happened so long ago that many no longer are aware what caused their original pain. 

God wants no one to suffer. He desires everyone to be healed from their affliction and for relationships to be restored.

It is through the power of Jesus Christ that heals the wounds of our past.  Life may never be the same after a loss, but with Jesus Christ, help life can bring you back on the road of security and stability, regardless of the family dysfunction of your pass.

As believers in Jesus Christ we are to be the light unto the world, even in the face of personal tragedy

6 In all this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. 7 These have come so that the proven genuineness of your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed.

Life, after tragedy, is hard.  We fall into periods of sadness as we think about the loved one who has died. Christmas doesn't carry the same enthusiasm. Joy to the world doesn't carry quite the same message when one is sad and thinking about their friend and the by gone memories with that person that are no more.

Hope is not lost when we think about our loved one singing at the top of their lungs while enjoying endless heavenly feasts with the King of kings and Lord of lords, none other than Jesus Christ.

Hope is not lost when you realize that not only he rescued your love one and brought them to their new heavenly home, but also walks with you in the quagmire of your grief.

Hope is never lost when you place one foot in front of the other and keep on with the same rituals of having quiet times, attending church and praying for one another just as you did before the loss.

Even as we grieve we can be the light to the world. When people ask you how you are doing and your response is " I am sad but I am trusting my Savior Jesus Christ each day" can be a seed that is planted in the heart of the unbeliever.  A  seed that may flourish once grief enters their own lives.

Over 2000 years ago Jesus entered the world a mere baby and began the path of being a light to the world.

A world so disparately in need of peace. A peace that cannot be found simply by meditating or by taking the best that all religions have to offer. A peace that only Jesus can provide to the aching soul of man.

As you proceed on this grief journey Jesus is building a platform so that one day your testimony from grief can be the light that others need to see. 

Listen to the sounds of the hammer putting the lumber of your platform together. Do you hear the power saws cutting up the lumber for your platform?  It is going to be an awesome platform when it is finish. You may not see the end to your pain, but God does and when the end is reached you are going to have an incredible testimony  that will bring people to the Savior. 

God gave hope through a simple baby boy born over 2000 years ago in a feeding trough, the only place that Joseph  could find so that Mary could give birth to the Savior of the world.

Joy to the world carries a whole lot more meaning when we begin to see that Christ gives us a living hope!

Muslims coming to Jesus (Isa) after Dreams , Visions and Miracles

Don’t overlook the obvious here, friends. With God, one day is as good as a thousand years, a thousand years as a day. God isn’t late with his promise as some measure lateness. He is restraining himself on account of you, holding back the End because he doesn’t want anyone lost. He’s giving everyone space and time to change. 2 Peter 3:9

This young woman is sharing her testimony of coming to Jesus Christ through dreams and revelation. We are living in a time of what can best be described as Spiritual warfare. Only God is able to see this war. The Spiritual re-birth of this young woman illustrates why we must never give up on people.As we watch the exodus of millions of Syrians leaving their homeland God is at work in the hearts and minds of these people. Won't you share with these people your faith in Jesus Christ?

We may be standing at the greatest miracle of God with these born again people. 

Recovering from the loss of a child

24 and let us consider how to stimulate one another to love and good deeds,25 not forsaking our own assembling together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another; and all the more as you see the day drawing near. Hebrews 10:24-25

The epicenter of grief. 

Like throwing a rock into a pond, the waves of grief flows outward, hitting all who knew that person.

It starts with the initial tremor at the very epicenter.

John and Kathy Smith had just brought their son home from the hospital for a routine tonsillectomy. Their son, Josh, was glad to be back home where he could sleep in his own bed surrounded by all of his  treasured possessions and his loved ones. Three hours after putting her son to bed Kathy woke up to check on him, only to find him unresponsive. She screams at the top of her lungs for her husband to come quickly. John quickly sizes up the situation and immediately starts CPR while telling Kathy to call 9-1-1.

Grief is a universal emotion that hits everyone who loved that person. The severity of  the response is dependent on how close we were to the loved one who died.

Then a strong aftershock occurs.

John and Kathy are in the living room praying for a miracle trying to hold it together for their other child.when the police chaplain comes out with those words no parent or loved one ever want to hear. "I'm truly sorry", the chaplain chokes up before continuing,"they did all they could,  but were unable to revive Josh."  Kathy collapses into John's arms while exclaiming, "no, no, nooooooo!"John tries to encourage the EMT's  to keep trying to revive Josh, but the one in charge goes over the checklist of everything they did to attempt to revive Josh. Their faces were equally in shock for they all had children Josh's age.The thing most of them wanted to do was go home and tell their child how much daddy loves them.

Many EMT's become distraught when a child dies and some are unable to return to the profession.

 It is at that point that John could no longer be strong and he too collapsed in a heap of sobs while reverberating to himself his failure as a dad to keep Josh alive.

Then a much stronger shock occurs.

When their surviving child  just learned that his brother was no longer alive he breaks down into heavy sobs as dad clutches him tighter as if he wanted his son to know that dad was going to protect him from the pain that has been thrust on him.

Once the EMT's and the police chaplain left John and Kathy knew that tomorrow was going to be a difficult day for their family which meant they had to get sufficient sleep. They decided for their family to sleep downstairs where they could all be together through this painful night.

The tremors calm down while the family slept.

Then the aftershocks are felt.

When Kathy told her parents about Josh's death her mom cried loudly into her phone. She could hear loud moans coming from her mom as she grappled with the realities of her grandson's death. When John told his parents they both collapsed from the weight of their grief.

Then a series of more aftershocks were felt.

John and Kathy called their son's school and within the hour, they started getting phone calls from Josh's friends and their parents who were equally despondent when they heard the news.

  All day long friends and neighbors came by their home to express sorrow.

Grief can affect a whole population as is the recent mass shootings in San Bernardino, Sandy Hook, and certainly, the day we witnessed two passenger jets slam into the World Trade Towers on September 11, 2001

 Yet, we have a tendency in our culture to want to 'grieve alone.'

 We fail to see the many connecting dots between the one who died and those who knew that person. Because we do not see others around us in pain, we grieve alone.

The aftershocks can linger for many months and even years after the original tremor.  Unresolved grief  can come out in the form of classroom learning problems, high-risk behavior, prolong depression and problems with the law; when many of his classmates continue to struggle with classroom learning, the classroom teacher may fail to connect their troubled student with their grief and refer them for ADHD testing. 

 Some are leaving their faith they once held in esteem.

Some are giving up on life and living the addictive cycle of drugs and alcohol.

 Some people who experience a traumatic loss may leave their faith because of the false thinking that "if God had only heard my prayer my loved one would still be alive." 

 For others, grief can actually strengthen their faith and reliance on God.

As a father who has suffered the loss no parent ever wants to experience,  I can tell  that God sent our family 'signs' that he would help us recover from our grief, but we had to 'trust him that he knows what he is doing with our lives.

The next time you feel the ripple of grief please know that there are others feeling the same pain of that loss. 
Don't deny that it is there. 

Don't try to go it alone, 

Lean into those emotions, trusting God with one step at a time and try talking with trusted friends about your pain. 

Please remember that God had a full plan for the life of your friend, but because we live in a fallen world unexplained death occurs.

 Finally, remember that God had the final victory when over 2000 years ago he allowed his son, Jesus Christ, to be crucified and buried before giving his son the final  victory with his resurrection  and the promise to us all that 'all things have been made new and that one day when we take our final earthly breath we will see our loved ones again!

One day, God will use your story to inspire others to survive their own journeys of loss.

One day in a Barnes and Noble Book store I was reminded of the powerful impact of encouraging words.

29 Let no [a]unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word is good for edification [b]according to the need of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who hear. Ephesians4:29-30

Today, I was reminded about the powerful impact that words can have on someone. A friend of mine, who I haven't seen for a while, shared with me that he still remembers the encouraging word I shared with him in church 20 years ago. I had forgotten those words, but over the last 20 years those words of encouragement kept being recalled over the course of his life.

Facebook is filled with unwholesome talk that does nothing more but tear the people who read them down. Cyber bullying does the same thing when the bullying strikes at their core value of who they are as a person; sometimes pushing people over the edge, sometimes a tragic end.

The holidays are often a stressful time for many people. Pressure to try to duplicate how mom and dad did Christmas comes into our consciousness as we rush to finish our Christmas shopping, planning the Christmas meal, and sending out the invites. We often become disillusioned when some invitations are turned down. The more I get to really know people I have concluded that life is filled with very wounded people. People who's armor has been chinked by a course unkind words, critical judgments that through time has left them emotionally defeated.

Just as a kind word is recalled over and over again in a person's life, an unkind word can remain in the consciousness of a person who grew up in a family where the hearing of such words was an everyday occurrence almost as if they were in a war.

The tongue can be used as a tool for building up someone and it can be used as weapon to destroy that same person. As you go about the holiday season and beyond remember to always think of words that will encourage people and that if there are wounded people in your life remember that it will take time for them to respond to your kind words. 

Remember that the holiday season isn't about us and our needs. It is in remembering that over two thousand years ago God sent to a hurting world through a virgin birth our redeemer who through time has restored and healed generations of wounded people.

Finally, it is up to God on his own timetable to bring healing and ultimate restoration to lives of wounded people, but it will be your words of encouragement, as well as others, that will enable God to heal them.

We, indeed, have an awesome God.

The downfall of Tom Petter'smight have begun in 2004 when his son John died

28 And they approached the village where they were going, and He acted as though He were going farther. 29 But they urged Him, saying, “Stay with us, for it is getting toward evening, and the day [f]is now nearly over.” So He went in to stay with them. 30 When He had reclined at the table with them, He took the bread and blessed it, and breaking it, He began giving it to them. 31 Then their eyes were opened and they recognized Him; and He vanished from [g]their sight. 32 They said to one another, “[h]Were not our hearts burning within us while He was speaking to us on the road, while He was [i]explaining the Scriptures to us?” 33 And they got up that very hour and returned to Jerusalem, and found gathered together the eleven and those who were with them,34 saying, “The Lord has really risen and has appeared to Simon.” 35 They began to relate [j]their experiences on the road and how He was recognized by them in the breaking of the bread. Luke 24:28-34

In the Minneapolis Star Tribune paper dated December 7th I read at the bottom of the article this very telling statement. 

A key event  was the 2004 death of his son. Peters contends that he was overwhelmed with grtef  and fell out of the loop during the fraud. " I made a huge error," Petters wrote, " John was killed. I was a wreck for several years and I tried to put on a public face that I was OK, but told everyone publicly  that John would have wanted me to go on and that it was fine. IT WAS AN ABSOLUTE LIE. My heart was broken.

As a dad who lost a child traumatically the first night home from the hospital I could feel the pain in every word of Petter's statement. Tom Petters did what most American's do when they suffer a sudden loss: they put on a tough exterior and pretend they are OK and tell themselves that everything is fine on the western front.

This is a false assumption and likely everyone's fatal error.  The emotions of grief need to find some way to be processed. If they aren't processed verbally then they will be processed internally. Our emotions can cause irreparable damage to our body through eating too much, drinking too much, engaging in dangerous activities, etc, etc.  Without properly processing our grief the brain itself will completely rewire itself causing many in the throes of grief to make critical errors of judgment. For most who make those critical errors they may not be noticed, but for a public figure like Tom Petters his critical errors might have contributed to the fraud that cost others millions.

While I am not excusing Mr. Petters for the fraud  I am speculating that he might have seen a completely different outcome had he not denied the pain and emotions when his son died.http://miamioh.edu/news/article/view/3236 According to this link Tom Petter's son was murdered when he was mistaken for a thief. 

What happened in 2004 illustrates why every organization ought to have an action plan on how to support their employees who find themselves in the difficulty of having to continue working after traumatic losses. Employees should be encouraged to get involved in grief support groups and individual counseling sessions to help them begin processing their loss. 

 Tom Petters said that he was a wreck for several years and I believe him. His son had been murdered and the pain from this type of loss is much deeper. It is one thing to bury a parent we have come to expect that they would one day die, but it is a whole other thing to have to bury a child, no matter what the age. 

It is our faith that helps us connect the dots of our pain and our eventually healing.  As we learn more and more about what the bible says about Jesus and the suffering he went through on the cross and as we read about the reality of his resurrection  we discover that there is hope after our loss. Jesus Christ is a living and breathing Savior two doesn't just sit in heaven, but through his holy spirit he help us to cope with our loss.

From mass shooting to the hope in Jesus

7 Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God; and everyone who loves is [a]born of God and knows God. I John 4:7

Today, we had another mass shooting. As word of the gunman leaked out I learned that the gunmen were dressed in black face masks and tactical gear, armed with long guns and pistols of which they entered a holiday party for San Bernardino county health workers as it was in full swing. Before they fled, they had killed 14 people and wounded 17 others.

One gunman was positively identified as Syed Farook, rumored to be a employed by the California State Health department. As I heard the name mentioned the hairs on my back stood up when I began to think of the mass hysteria toward anyone with a foreign sounding name the day after this horrific event.

 I have always had empathy toward those who suffer. It goes back to when I was in the first grade when I chose to do a picture book I called, 'growing up black' I have always had the ability to project others into my stories and make them feel the emotions of the thoughts I was trying to convey.  In junior high  I would write my history papers from the first person perspective of a news anchorman helping the reader  to think he was right there in the story.

Syed Farook

Foreign sounding name

Once again there will be mass hysteria  and   paranoia toward anyone with a foreign sounding name.

 Several days ago a woman of the Muslim faith went out with her nieces to the local Applebees and was struck in the face with a beer mug  by another woman who was angered toward what she represented. She required multiple stitches, has nightmares cannot sleep, and is filled with fear that every time she ventures out that someone will hit her or spit on her because of who she represented in their minds.

Mass hysteria prevents people from seeing the good from the bad  It causes the mob mentality to take over their rational thought process. It breeds hate and puts a large group of people on edge because they have a foreign sounding name.

Now I want to introduce you to Nabeel Qureshi.

 Nabeel was a former Muslim, converted to the Christian faith because of a friendship he struck up with  another Christian who took the step of faith and reached out to him. No mass hysteria. No paranoia.  Simply the love of Christ.  

It is important as we go about our usual business tomorrow to see people through the eyes of God. 

 The more I interact with different cultural groups I find that many of them would grow anxious when  atrocities are done bu a few really bad people. The motives of good people are questioned whenever a person with a foreign name kills innocent people.

 If you are prone to mass hysteria and paranoid thinking following these horrific events I encourage you to avoid listening to the radio or even the evening news which will do nothing but aggravate you.

Instead, think of the thousands of people with foreign sounding names living the American dream just as you are and who are no more likely to kills as the majority of American's.http://www.biography.com/people/groups/immigration-us-immigrant

As you encounter people tomorrow with foreign sounding names please offer them a smile and wish them a good day. If you had the extra occasion to spend time with them offer to treat them to a meal out as a token of your appreciation for them.

A famous song I remember from my youth reminds me that one person can make a difference in a world of mass hysteria and paranoia. Won't you join me to make a difference in this world? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tadZ8nCLBsI