Is grieving a badge of honor or dishonor?

The Lord is near to the brokenhearted

and saves the crushed in spirit. Psalm 34:18

Somehow I think we got it all wrong in our American society. As parents we want to somehow 'shrink wrap' our children and give them nothing but a conglomeration of positive ego enhancing experiences. We protect them from the experiences of death by getting a baby sitter for them when we have to make the obligatory trip to a funeral for a loved one who has died.

This week I saw how the accumulative effects of this can have on young adults. When young people are not getting the tools they need to help them grieve we are doing a huge disservice to them. I had one 55 year old gentleman tell me that he "doesn't believe in going to funerals" because it makes him sad. This man's thinking, I am afraid, is the way most American's feel about grieving.

When bad things happen they would rather stop off at a liquor store for a bottle of wine and sit before the fireplace drinking their sorrows away. As I write this post the Republican party controlled house and senate are in the process of passing a law that eliminates the blue laws and permit's liquor stores to sell liquor on Sundays; something I do not support simply because it sends a wrong message about how to process the bad things that happen to good people.. If this law is passed I can see this conversation taking place in our homes

Wife says to the husband in a phone call," Honey, the neighbor boy across the street got hit by a car and died." Husbands response, " I'll stop off at the liquor store and buy a bottle of wine and maybe we can console our selves with this tragic news"

According to the Barna group most American's are divided on the importance of attending church. https://www.barna.org/barna-update/culture/661-americans-divided-on-the-importance-of-church#.VMIXytLF-So Passing the blue laws, I am afraid sends a message that chemicals, not God, is the solution to grieving.

Yet, the verse from Psalm is a reminder that God is truly close to the brokenhearted. Church isn't about just feeling good. Church is about walking with those who are grieving. It isn't about surrounding ourselves with happy go lucky people who give us a temporary emotional band aid that makes us feel good until that is when we go home, close our door, and once again face our grief.

The greatest decision our family made after the loss of our special loved one was to keep putting one foot in front of the other and keep on going to church one Sabbath at a time, even when we didn't feel like it.

I believe when we are grieving it becomes a badge of honor because it is an opportunity to be still and listen to God speak to our hearts. As Christian's we would be wise to seek out those who are grieving because when we do we just may be touch by the heart of God through those people.

Teaching our children the hard things in life and letting them know that when bad things happen to good people emotions will come that they may not understand,but teaching them to lean into each of those emotions, not avoid them, will help them navigate their grief.

Death and dying is a fact of life in our world. The more our kid's learn about grief the better equipped they will be when that day arrives and we send them off into the world.

This little light of mine, I am going to let it shine

New International Version

In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven. Matthew 5:16

A simple drink of water in the middle of the night got me to look out and see the bright colorful Christmas lights on the trees out front and the manger scene lit up and the message of hope that sends into a drab hopeless world.  The song, 'this little light of mine' kept going through my mind like a endless tape. 

The daily newspaper world wants to remind us how really bad it is in the world around us. Murders, drugs, cultural clashes leading to young men and woman traveling abroad to fight with Isis. Young men and young woman looking for hope in all the wrong places try to find it in dangerous places.

Everywhere one turns there is a no shortage of grief. Young kids dying changes the lives forever, it seems, in their parents who raised them. Where once their family was happy and enjoying pizza nights with friends and other family members now deescalate into a vicious cycle of  depression and anger.

People everywhere are searching for hope and meaning for their lives.  For those of us who are believers in Jesus Christ, especially as God brings you to the other side of your grief, we understand the importance of making sense of the tragedies of this life.

Some of the greatest joys is discovering that it isn't when we are blessed with material possessions that bring us closer to God, but it is when tragedy hits us when we can just barely get out of bed when we make that decision to keep moving forward trusting God with one footprint at a time that He knows what he is doing with our lives. 

I finished drinking from my glass and take one more look out of the living room window at the hope and message those lights are sending into the world.

This little light of mine, I 'm gonna let it shine. Let it shine, let it shine, let it shine.

From Selma to Montgomery, the freedom march that changed our nation

26 Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? 27 And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life?[a] 28 And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, 29 yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these.

Last evening my wife and I decided to attend the showing of the movie Selma. It is a movie about a black leader and a man of God who decided to heed the call of God and risk his life and the lives of others to bring to the public's attention the powerful impact of institutional racism on the black man and woman.

I grew up in the 1960's. It was a most turbulent time for us who did so. I would have to say that growing up in this period was the defining moment for America. It was a time when our eyes were enlightened by the horrors of racism.

From the lynchings of innocent black people to the denial of their voting rights by the local white establishment we witness for the first time those horrors through the eyes of a man of God who chose to win this battle, not with a colt 45, but through peaceful marches.

I remember reading about the Selma marches and watching as the white establishment stood on the famous Edmund Pettus Bridge with their barb wire wrapped clubs, their gas masks on, waiting for the order to attack and disperse the crowd of white, black people who were there because they were moved by the horrific situation of racism in the south.

Just before this movie came out my wife, son and I had a chance to tour the Civil Rights Museum in Montgomery, Alabama where we got the chance to read the stories of the men and woman, black and white, whose lives were taken away all in the name of fighting for the same rights that whites have had the privilege of experiencing. To think in the 60's we had separate lodging for blacks and whites, separate wash rooms, and separate educational institutions seems unimaginable to me today.

Yet, if my own Hopkins High school can be used as an example there were no blacks that I was aware of who attended that school in 1974, but today Hopkins is fully integrated with a vast array of races getting the education they never would have received in the 60's

We have made strides over the years, but the battle is not done. There is another horrific institution that continues to be a killing machine for babies of all races. It started out as a innocent sounding group called the American Birth Control League by Margaret Sanger, but this 'league' is anything but innocent. To illustrate this I am posting the video Maarfa21 and encourage you to view it when you have time:http://youtu.be/0eWxCRReTV4 As you watch this video you will notice that some very famous families who have done good became the primary contributors of this organization.

If we are serious in ending racism then we need to write our Congressman and demand that Planned Parenthood be unfunded and abortions be brought to an end.

As we honor the work of Martin Luther King, Jr. I encourage you to go see the movie Selma. The work of this movement woke up America to the dangers of racism.

If ever there was someone who deserved to carry a grudge it was Louie Zamperini

Proverbs 17:22A joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.

Bullied as a kid

Disciplined harshly by his earthly father

laughed at by his older brother

Chased after by the local police

for

petty crimes

After years of preparation and encouragement of his running ability

Louie went to the Olympic games

where he was bunched in by other runners

and 

spiked in his ankles

yet

he never gave up and finished the race with bloodied ankles and all

When he enlisted in the service and was assigned to a bombardier 

he survived multiple days in a life raft

with two survivors 

in

sharp infested waters

shot at by Japanese war planes

until their raft found land

the wrong island

surrounded by gun toting Japanese who

cruelly beat him

and

At the encouragement of a Japanese superior 

named Bird

he was beaten to a bloodied pulp

at the slightest indiscretion

yet

Louie never gave up his will to live

through the life of his bombardier partner

he discovered that there was a man 

who suffered far worse than he

a man who performed miracles and spoke many truths from the bible

a man that was God's son

who came to reconcile the world

to give hope to everyone 

that called upon his name

Jesus gave him the will to live

and

to forgive his captors

to forgive even the Bird who was the cause of most of his grief

God

wants us to live in harmony  with those we consider our enemies

What we consider impossible  to do as humans

Jesus helps us do the impossible

and help you to forgive past relationships

and

help heal those past sour friendships

that cause bitterness to take root

Louie Zamperini had every right to remain bitter

yet, 

through the power of Jesus Christ 

he turned to the Cross and laid down his bitterness

his hatred

and gave it all to God

and when the Olympic games came to Japan 

he carried the torch 

as thousands of Japanese bystanders 

cheered him on

Now that is the power of forgiveness!!

Four civil rights leaders, opposite and divergent styles of leading

21Then Peter came and said to Him, "Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me and I forgive him? Up to seven times?" 22Jesus said to him, "I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven.… Matthew 18:21

Our family just recently returned from Alabama where we celebrated the holiday with our Sister-in-law and her husband in the town of Athen's, Alabama, just outside of Huntsville. Toward the end of our stay my wife, son and I traveled to the deep south toward the Gulf shores.

We stopped in Montgomery, Alabama and toured the famed Civil Rights Museum. This region is filled with history and the birthplace of the modern Civil Rights movement.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X4h-HReF-y8

Martin Luther King, Jr. and Ralph Abernathy believed in peaceful demonstrations that would eventually shed light on how evil racism in the south really was. Dr. King began preaching from a tiny baptist church in Montgomery which to this day had been restored and open to tours.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z_ZgSK9yIbk At this link I included Dr. King's famous' I have a dream speech.'

As I studied Dr. King I realized that he incorporated many of the qualities of Christ into his day to day ministry. I am sure that Dr. King started out in his ministry perfectly content to preach to gospel in a simple church, but when God called him to right a social injustice he got up and left his comfort zone and answered the call. Leaving the Pulpit meant risking life and limb for not only himself, but those who joined him in these peaceful demonstrations. Answering the call meant that he could no longer avoid the voice of God within for he knew that heaven was crying for these social injustices.

Today, we have one more social injustice that needs to be right once and for all. It is the social injustice caused by America's number one killing machine, Planned Parenthood. Started out as the Birth control movement by Margaret Sanger, Planned Parenthood evolved into the biggest killing machine of African American babies by placing these clinics in poor neighborhoods. If you want to see what kind of woman Margaret Sanger was I encourage you to watch this video of a news interview with her. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HsrOPDdbTzM

I urge the Republican party to do the right thing and de-fund this massive killing machine. De-funding Planned Parenthood would save millions every year. To get a glimpse of the evils of the abortion machine I encourage you to watch Maafa 21 at this link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0eWxCRReTV4

If we truly care about people, regardless of race, creed and disability we must stand up for them. 

Are you willing to step out of your comfort zone to help correct this social injustice.  I encourage you to write your congressional representatives and urge them to de-fund this organization and remind them that we have a much better alternative, adoption.

Finally, I encourage everyone to go on a Civil rights tour of Montgomery, Alabama, the birthplace of the modern civil rights movement.