Make sure that your character is free from the love of money, being content with what you have; for He Himself has said, “I will never desert you, nor will I ever forsake you,” Hebrews 13:5
When I was a really young child, I remember sitting in the Sunday school class at the Lutheran Church of Reformation off of Highway 100 listening to stories from the Bible about Jesus. I remember in my child like faith picturing heaven as a separate place from the earth and for the first time seeing God as someone who loved me.
At night, I remember praying this nighttime prayer, ' Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep, if I should die before I awake, I pray the Lord my soul to take.'
I remember the Bible camps at this same church and loving learning all I could about Jesus.
I remember when I attended Westview public Elementary school walking with other Christian kids off of the school property to learn more about Jesus one afternoon a week. I was filled with awe that Jesus loved me so much that He died for me.
I remember asking Jesus why he made me as a child with a hearing loss and why I wore a hearing aid when I could see my friends without those ugly devices. Jesus assured me He loved me as much as the other children.
I remember just as I was ending the 6th grade Sunday school classes at Reformation having to say goodbye to friendships and making new ones at a much larger, but closer Church. That fall, I remember starting Confirmation classes. For the first time, I saw the hypocrisy of other middle schoolers who seemed to be there out of obligation to their parents, not out of love for Jesus. My prayers got lost in a sea of hypocrisy. I was tossing in a raft of despair.
I remember during this time praying a prayer that was much more sophisticated. Sensing that my parents were going through difficult times, I prayed for them. I watched my mom during this time battling depression ( I didn't connect her losing her mom during this period as partly responsible for her emotions)
'Dear Jesus, I pray for my mom who looks sad and I pray you will comfort her. I pray for my dad that you will help him to provide for his family. Thank you, Jesus, for dying on the cross for us.
When I reached high school, I was once again lost in the sea of hypocrisy and despair. We weren't allowed to mention the name of Jesus in school, supposedly because religion and public education don't mix. My hope was lost in a sea of condemnation and anger toward the one who made me. My despair reached the point where I decided to take off the hearing device I wore since pre-school. My world became smaller as I tried to communicate with a normal hearing world.
Just before I was to graduate, a friend invited me to hear how having a personal relationship with Jesus can radically change my life. That Friday night I went. I saw smiling faces in a sea of optimism that I hadn't seen before. I heard people singing and clapping their hand's songs about this redeemer. At the end, the song leader shared his testimony about this Jewish carpenter that came into his life. He invited each of us to listen to the voice of the one knocking at our heart's door. In the quietness of my mind and with gentle coaching of one of those I trusted, I prayed the prayer of salvation- 'Dear Jesus, I know that I'm a sinner and that nothing I can do in this life can earn my way to heaven, I open the door to my heart and ask you to come into my life.'
I cannot explain it, but looking back my life was radically changed because of that prayer. Jesus showed me the verse from John about the blind man where his parents were told that this man wasn't born blind because of some sin, but he was made this way so that the works of God can be shown in him. I saw myself as uniquely made.
Through the years, my prayers were for doing well on the tests, to help me decide what to do with the rest of my life, where I should work, who should be my friend, what I should study in college and I prayed for my parents for their health.
After my marriage to Linda, we prayed for children and when God honored that we prayed for their health and for their salvation. We made sure their faith would blossom by staying committed to a Christian church that loved the Lord Jesus with all their heart and every fiber of their being.
When the sadness returned with our youngest passing, I remember my heartfelt prayer simply, 'Please help me raise my son to adulthood unscathed.' I penned my thoughts, tossing every emotion I was feeling on paper because I was determined not to let the trauma of losing a child not to defeat us. My Savior honored that prayer through the sermons and through friends in our Sunday school class
On a supernaturally level, I sensed Jesus the good shepherd wrapping his arms around us and gently leading us through the despair and doubt. While I will readily admit that losing a child was the hardest thing I ever had to do as a parent, there was no doubt that God was there for our family every step of the way with each of us coming out Spiritually and emotionally stronger.
Where is Jesus in your life? I encourage you to do what I did and open the door to your heart and ask Him in.
There is no doubt you will be glad you did!
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