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Sunday, September 22, 2019

If You Could See Me Now (HD) A blog post in honor of a first cousin who lost his wife to cancer




My Father’s house has many rooms; if that were not so, would I have told you that I am going there to prepare a place for you? And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am. John 14:2-3

Yesterday was a day of helping Joel remember his wife who fell to the ravishes of cancer just a week before. This 'celebration' was held at their home in Rush City, Minnesota. I enjoyed seeing Connie's pictures displayed on a large table in his home and listening to the story of how they met. Joel and I were the cousin's closest in age and hence we often hung out at the few family reunions my family went to over the years.  Joel's dad taught his two sons how to hunt and fish and how to shoot a hunting rifle.  He developed a love for the outdoors whether it was on a lake, in the open field hunting deer, or building homes as a contractor- so it wasn't surprising that he met his wife at a cabin.

I was lamenting his loss, just as he lamented with me that there wasn't a day that he didn't stop thinking of my daughter Maria.  He was there in 2007 at the funeral home in Anoka waiting in the long line to see our daughter. 

As I tell people  I meet, we live in a fallen world where bad things happen to good people.  In a more perfect world, there would be no cancer, nor would there be pain medication that would lead to the death of a loved one following their 'routine' orthopedic surgery.

'If you could see me now' are lyrics that should bring all grieving people to comfort because it reminds us that our loved one is now in a beautiful place, a place that all of us will be one day because of what Jesus Christ did on the cross of calvary for all of our sin's.

When we lose a loved one after spending so many years with that person it will take time to recover from the pain associated with that loss.  This is where faith plays into it- to continue one's commitment to a local church, one footstep at a time, regardless of how you're feeling from moment to moment while trusting that God understands what to do with your pain is the secret to grief recovery.  I've learned that it is when we are broken that God speaks closes to us.

For anyone experiencing the emotional heartbreaking pain, I would encourage you to find a 13-week grief share group near year. Grief share will teach you how to go through the pain, not around it.

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