The hardest thing about being a dad is seeing your kids in pain

If one member suffers, all suffer together; if one member is honored, all rejoice together. 1Corinthians 12:26

Tonight, I reflected what it must have been like for God to watch from the distance the pain that his son was under as he was flogged, whipped, and nailed to the cross as shock waves of pain permeated throughout his body and what it must have felt like when his son died.

  One of the hardest parts of being a dad is watching your children in emotional and/or physical pain and feeling hopeless about what to do about it.  As a dad you want so much to wave that pain away or even to wish that his/her pain gets transferred to you so your child can live live free of all hurts. That is not reality and when our child goes through pain we must allow him or her to work through the pain on their own.  If we always stepped in to rescue them whenever something bad happens to them would be enabling and not a healthy thing to do if we want our kids to grow into healthy,vibrant and emotionally healthy adults.

As my son described his fears to me the only thing I could do was listen.  Sometimes that is all our kids need is for their dad to listen to them.  Listening to them share their pain is a way for them to bring it to the surface where they can begin to process it..  Bringing it to the surface helps them to recognize what it is that is bothering them and it gives you the opportunity to remind them that God understands the pain they are feeling and he will help them process their pain..

 One of the most important things I learned from my grief journey is the importance of being honest with your feelings and the hurts and not try to stuff them way down and avoid dealing with them.  I learned  that God isn't afraid of  my anger or whatever else that burdens me. He knows that even though you may  not feel safe sharing your burdens with  friends you can still share your burdens with God because he created you and he knows your unique struggles in life.

. After listening to him I gently laid my hand on his shoulder and prayed for him.  I prayed that the band tour would be an awesome experience for him and that there would be positive memories coming from this trip and I prayed that God would heal the hurts that he and many of his classmates are having.

  The greatest gift we can give our kids is the gift of hope and the reminder that the Savior is walking with them wherever they are going in this life and He will be there for them through the rugged patches of life where it seems the pain is unbearable and he will be there where there is unspeakable joy and happiness.

I may not be on that tour in bodily form, but I know that my God will and the promises in his word assure me that they are in good hands. .