‘This is what you are to say to Joseph: I ask you to forgive your brothers the sins and the wrongs they committed in treating you so badly.’ Now please forgive the sins of the servants of the God of your father.” When their message came to him, Joseph wept. His brothers then came and threw themselves down before him. “We are your slaves,” they said.19 But Joseph said to them, “Don’t be afraid. Am I in the place of God? You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives. Genesis 50
I was reminded last night the importance of trusting God with the pain that has taken root when a loss occurs. In some families, there is the 'tradition' that when bad things happen they go out and get drunk. Since the older we get there is a lot of drinking and partaking that goes on that can really end badly if one is pulled over for a DUI, become diagnosed with diabetes, or heart disease, or clinical depression creating more pain and suffering for those around them.
The story from Genesis 50 about a man named Joseph who was loved by his father Jacob and hated by Joseph's brothers who kidnapped and sold him to a couple of vagabonds thinking that now they wouldn't have to deal with their brother's favoritism. By this time Joseph had found favor by Pharoah and was now in a leadership position when his brothers returned to beg for forgiveness by prostrating themselves and declaring themselves his slaves. Joseph uttered those words, " you intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done.https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Genesis%2050
When pain and suffering come, we are quick to blame God, throw out the bible ( the one source of comfort) and grab the nearest liquor bottle and drown our sorrows away whenever a loss occurs. We live in a world of instant gratification. We want lunch we grab something quick at the drive-through. When memories are too great after a loss we move away in hopes that those memories won't follow us.
When pain and suffering come, I've learned that the best thing we can do is to stay on the journey we're on while trusting God that he knows what to do with your pain. This isn't going to be easy by any stretch of the imagination and the path will be filled with many triggers of your loss, but I can assure you that if you give it time ( remember there is no timetable to your grief because the pain you feel is a reflection of the love for the person who died) you will begin to see God's greater picture for this pain- much like the story of Joseph.
Finally, if there is any takeaway to this post, it is that drinking and drugs are not the healthy way of processing one's pain. Alcohol is a depressant that can only lead to more pain, more complicated grief, and in the end health diagnosis, you wished you never had.
If you are suffering from the ramifications of a loss of a loved one, I encouraged you to look for a grief share group near you. This 13-week group will teach you how to go through the pain, not around it.https://griefshare.org
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