Translate

Wednesday, December 4, 2013

The Legacy of dad





Psalm 28:77 The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and I am helped. My heart leaps for joy and I will give thanks to him in song.

My father passed away a few years ago from the terrible disease known as Parkinson's disorder. Before he was diagnosed with this disease he had problems with his eye sight which lead him to a retina specialist when his retina began detaching. Two retina surgeries couldn't restore his eye sight.

Dad had a rough beginning in life. Shortly after he was born his mom died suddenly of unknown causes. My dad's dad, being a veteran of the First world war was now dealing with  immense grief on top of what at that time was considered 'shell shock' from his war experience.

 There was no diagnosis of post traumatic stress disorder, nor did they have the kind of information we have today to treat complicated grief issues. Dad, along with his older brother were taken in by his mother's family in Crystal, Minnesota who now had to raise these two boys, as well as get through the grief of losing a daughter.   I never really knew my dad's dad because he died not long after I was born. I was told that his dad loved making things out of wood. 

Life was hard for my dad, but he did well at Robbinsdale High school before going on to the University of Wisconsin.   My dad had the most beautiful handwriting, having won the 'Palmer Penmanship award' in school.. He couldn't understand why schools would even take this highly touted writing program out of the schools.

 He would later join the Navy in World war II and then the Marine corp during the Korean war conflict. After college he moved east to take a job with a Chemical company but that lasted briefly until he moved back home to take a job with Northern States Power company.He met my mom who lived next door with her sister.  He fell in love with this woman, married before they moved into a newly built   3 bed room rambler  in St. Louis Park, Minnesota. He momentarily entertained the thought of moving into a bigger and nicer home in Plymouth, but decided a bigger home wasn't worth the price for the stability and security of their present location.

There is another side of my dad I think you should know that I really didn't understand until 2007 when our daughter passed away. He was a man who always made sure his family made it to church.  Mom and Dad were founding members of Reformation Lutheran Church in St. Louis Park, Minnesota.  We had our Sunday rituals of going to church and then going to Perkin's restaurant afterwards for lunch. What I came to appreciate about my dad years later ((funny how that works) was that he learned that even in the face of suffering he kept placing one foot in front of the other. He had his favorite sayings he would tell us. When something we perceive as bad that might happen he reminded us  with the words " Let's not cross that bridge until we come to it."  Dad was good at helping us to focus on the long term goal in life.  

Not long before he died a nurse asked this electrical engineer what was his greatest accomplishment in life and without batting an eye he smiled and said " my greatest accomplishment in life was raising my family."  

 Little did I realized that the lessons I learned from him would help me as our family traveled our own sudden tragedy.  Since I had a dad who modeled for me the faithfulness of attending church I was able to remind my son that even when we do not feel like going to church we need to keep putting one foot in front of the other and go so that we might experience the kind words and encouragement of others at church.

When tragedy happens we must trust God that he knows what he is doing. We have a Father in heaven who wants to spend time with you  Our father in heaven understands that life is going to be hard and bad things will happen, but when bad things happen we have a Heavenly father who wants to walk with you on whatever journey you may be on.

 Won't you invite him into your life today? Like my dad learned you will not regret making that decision.

No comments:

Post a Comment