6 Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.”
There is a difference between how kids celebrate the joy of Christmas versus the adults in their lives. Kids find joy in every little thing from anticipating what is in those gifts under the Christmas tree to going shopping at the mall to see Santa Claus to perhaps sitting on Santa's lap to tell him what they would like for Christmas.
The adults in their lives have a mixed bag of emotions from their earlier days when their favorite aunt or uncle or grandparent was still alive when the smell of freshly baked cookies filled the kitchen. For many Adults their eyes become moist when they look at pictures of their deceased loved one. For some, they just assume not to open up that albun which will certainly trigger their emotions if they did.
For some adults, the memories of lost loved ones sends them into a downward spiral of over consumption of alcohol and or legalized marijuana that for still some ends up in their own tragic death, creating a new layer of grief for the adults in their lives.
For me, the way I coped with the sudden loss of my daughter Maria was turning to God and relying on my faith community. I've found that recovery from grief isn't possible to do it alone. It is important that we all find a faith community of people who are safe for us to communicate our deepest needs.
Christmas, I've learned isn't about how many gifts we have under the tree. Christmas is about celebrating the birth of Jesus who came into a hurting world, not much different than the world we see today. We celebrate Christmas because Jesus came into the world to unite all humanity regardless of what worldview they currently possess. I'm reminded when I listen to testimonies how God often gives a vision in the minds of people who have chosen a different path to follow, but after their dream they make a commitment to follow Jesus.
As we sit by the Christmas tree remembering mom's love for cooking, or her occasional phone calls telling us that we can do anything we set our mind to, or being our cheer leader when she talks to her sisters and brothers, we can cling to God's word that "He will never leave you or forsake you."
There is one more thing a grieving person can do and that would be consider a group support group like Grief share or Compassionate Friends. I say this because it is essential that you tell your story about your loss to a community that truly understands what it is like to lose a child, parent, sibling, or other loved one.
As you do this, your pain will become less and your heart will become softer which will lead to helping others to recover simply through listening to their pain. In this sense, God will not waste the pain you're currently experiencing.
Christmas and New years is about celebrating the gift God gave the world which is sending baby Jesus in the form of a simple manger.
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