Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.”Deuteronomy 31:6
" My God, my God! Why have your forsaken me??" I called out as I tried to walk forward in the every increasingly slippery sand. " Why God!!!" I paused to spit out some sand that made it's way into my mouth cavity. " I thought you were my best friend? We were enjoying life in the lush mellow watching our two kids chasing butterfly's until you lead me into this God Forsaken barren waste land!.
I had to shift my weight as the increasing weight of my son on my shoulders was causing a pain. I wanted to set him down just for a minute but was afraid I wouldn't be able to get him back up there because of the increasing velocity of the the winds which was causing the hot sand to blow on us.. I felt my wife's hand at my back and just knew she was relying on me to get us to safety.
"Why God!" I continued to cry out with anguish."What did I do to deserve this place? Didn't I do enough for you just taking my family to church and even teaching Sunday school? Wasn't it enough that my kids accepted you as their Savior and Lord of their life?" I paused as I again shifted my weight for fear that a single fall on my part would mean I wouldn't be able to get back up in this ever increasing blowing storm.
I could hear my wife quoting scriptural verses to me from behind which momentarily encouraged me to press on ahead.
"Trust in the Lord with all your heart," came the voice of my wife behind me. " and do not lean on your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge him and he will make your paths straight."
I pressed on while she continued, "So do not fear, for I am with you, do not be dismayed for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."
As I heard the word of God spoken from my wife as she clung onto me I felt a strength within me to press on. My body ached from the weight as I walked through the uneven blowing sand, but I felt this inner strength within me that kept me moving forward. My wife continued to encourage me despite her own sadness
As I heard the word of God spoken from my wife as she clung onto me I felt a strength within me to press on. My body ached from the weight as I walked through the uneven blowing sand, but I felt this inner strength within me that kept me moving forward. My wife continued to encourage me despite her own sadness
"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world."
I took a misstep and almost went down on one knee when I was able to make a minor correction in my balance. Sand particles got in my eye which momentarily blinded me. I asked my son since he was above me to take his hand and wipe the sand from his dad's eyes. As my son did he whispered, " I love you daddy, are we going to be OK?"
I felt tears welling up within me as I searched for words to encourage him. " James, we are going to make it, With God's help Daddy's going to get us to safety."
I didn't know if I was telling a lie, but I had to rely on God's promises that " He will never forsake us,nor leave us. As I pressed on through the blowing sand I could hear James, "For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline."
As I walked this uneven burning desert sand I was now hearing words of encouragement from my wife and son. Just as one finished the other encouraged. I was beginning to feel myself being energized to keep going.
Then I heard many faint prayers for me off in the distance. I had a hard time making out what those prayers were, but the more I heard them I realized they were praying for us. Some of the prayers were from fiends we knew. I could tell from their voices. I knew their voice. They were friends of ours. I heard our Pastor's prayer for my family. I knew his voice. Those voices I was hearing were making me strong. I was able to stand upright and see ahead. For the first time I could hear a voice behind me. It wasn't my wife, nor was it my son. It was a familiar voice that comforted me in the past.
I pressed on with a new strength convinced that we're going to make it. I swear I heard the words of a prophet of the past exclaimed these words, "And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord."
As I heard those words I got stronger. My legs got stronger and I was able to take bigger steps in the sinking sand. As I heard the prayers for our family, the voice of prophets and the verses coming from my son and wife I knew we were going to make it. I no longer felt the burning sand on my skin as though I was being protected in some way.
I felt the hand of Jesus gently touch my shoulder and with the other hand He pointed ahead. I looked toward the horizon and for the first time I could see and taste hope. Looking ahead I could see calm. I could see no blowing sand. I could see a lush meadow where butter flies are floating. I could see those whose voices I was hearing standing. They were cheering for us. For the first time since entering this place I felt a small smile form on my face. I looked up at my son and behind to my wife and exclaimed, " With God's help I know we're going to make it!"
I took a misstep and almost went down on one knee when I was able to make a minor correction in my balance. Sand particles got in my eye which momentarily blinded me. I asked my son since he was above me to take his hand and wipe the sand from his dad's eyes. As my son did he whispered, " I love you daddy, are we going to be OK?"
I felt tears welling up within me as I searched for words to encourage him. " James, we are going to make it, With God's help Daddy's going to get us to safety."
I didn't know if I was telling a lie, but I had to rely on God's promises that " He will never forsake us,nor leave us. As I pressed on through the blowing sand I could hear James, "For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline."
As I walked this uneven burning desert sand I was now hearing words of encouragement from my wife and son. Just as one finished the other encouraged. I was beginning to feel myself being energized to keep going.
Then I heard many faint prayers for me off in the distance. I had a hard time making out what those prayers were, but the more I heard them I realized they were praying for us. Some of the prayers were from fiends we knew. I could tell from their voices. I knew their voice. They were friends of ours. I heard our Pastor's prayer for my family. I knew his voice. Those voices I was hearing were making me strong. I was able to stand upright and see ahead. For the first time I could hear a voice behind me. It wasn't my wife, nor was it my son. It was a familiar voice that comforted me in the past.
I pressed on with a new strength convinced that we're going to make it. I swear I heard the words of a prophet of the past exclaimed these words, "And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord."
As I heard those words I got stronger. My legs got stronger and I was able to take bigger steps in the sinking sand. As I heard the prayers for our family, the voice of prophets and the verses coming from my son and wife I knew we were going to make it. I no longer felt the burning sand on my skin as though I was being protected in some way.
I felt the hand of Jesus gently touch my shoulder and with the other hand He pointed ahead. I looked toward the horizon and for the first time I could see and taste hope. Looking ahead I could see calm. I could see no blowing sand. I could see a lush meadow where butter flies are floating. I could see those whose voices I was hearing standing. They were cheering for us. For the first time since entering this place I felt a small smile form on my face. I looked up at my son and behind to my wife and exclaimed, " With God's help I know we're going to make it!"
Wow, Todd, a beautiful, well written, story. I know and have felt the same things as I know that many others (i.e., men/husbands, wives, and children) have felt these things as well. Thank you for sharing and adding clarity through words and verse to a common angst and longing that many men feel who know and love God. This is righteous stuff. God bless you and your family. Mark.
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