The prayer of Jabaz His name means pain

Jabez cried out to the God of Israel, "Oh, that you would bless me and enlarge my territory! Let your hand be with me, and keep me from harm so that I will be free from pain." And God granted his request




As my wife and I normally do we attended the worship service at our church. On this particular Sunday our Pastor spoke on the prayer of Jabaz. I have heard sermons in the past on this little known person in the bible, but what I had forgotten was the cultural context of his name. In those days children were given names that represented what their families were experiencing in life. As in the case of Jabaz his name meant sorrow and pain because his mom's child birth had been particularly painful. 'Wow! Not sure if I want to walk around trying to live down the meaning of my name.It seems that God specializes using the most insignificant people in the bible to do mighty things. This little prayer offered up by a insignificant figure serves as a reminder how God does answer prayer.  We are reminded daily through the news media how dangerous  is the world,. God reminds us that when we pray to him he will make the place we are in safe and secure just like he granted Jabaz his request.

When families are in the depths of grief it is normal to feel as though pain and sorrow is their closest friend. We are reminded in Jabaz's prayer that the best thing we can do when we are in pain is to  bring our pain to the Savior. It is our Savior who understands thoroughly what it is like to suffer.  It is God who understands what it means to lose a son.

On the same day as our worship service Linda and I attended our first Life group. This group is made up of 3 other couples from our church who meet for friendship, relationship building and prayer support. Ecclesiates 4:12 reminds us that 3 strands are not easily broken and when we meet with others we stand a greater chance of surviving the chaos in the world.  

Our God answers prayers! That is very good news. To think he took the pain and sorrow of Jabaz and made him free from pain reminds us that God can take any terrible tragedy in our lives and turn it into something good. So go ahead and pray to God because we have a God who answers prayers.

Lessons learn from past grief

I

t is cold and blustery this Christmas season. Looking out the bay window one would never guess it was this cold outdoors and only when you walk outdoors do you instantly feel the pain in your hand do you realize the severity of the cold.


I guess this is Minnesota and maybe I ought to be use to it having grown up in this cold landscape. My memories of winters growing up were helping my dad start both cars several hours each morning. At precisely the hours of 2 and 4 I would be woken up from a deep sleep only to have to put on my clothes, winter coat to go out and help dad start the cars. We had no garage and as dear old dad explained it the GI bill didn't allow for the luxury of having a garage built with the house. I must admit I didn't feel deprived not having a garage and when I look back few neighbors even kept their cars inside because of all the junk they had sitting inside.


One more memory from my childhood was when my younger brother's best friend Danny died. My brother was in preschool. I didn't know his friend well ( there was a 9 year age difference ), but I remembered having a heavy heart and feeling sad watching my younger brother go through the grief and loss of his friend.


Around that same time I remembered my parents getting us in the car one late afternoon and driving up to the Milaca hospital where we saw our grandmother who was happy to see us. I remember watching her as she laid flat on the hospital bed. I remembered saying goodbye and not long after we returned home that my mom received the news that grandma had died. I was 8 at the time of her death and seeing someone you loved passing away left me with a heavy heart. One moment I saw her alive and smiling on her hospital bed and the next moment I am glancing at her in her casket at the Lutheran church in Foley, Minnesota. Perhaps the hardest grief I ever had to do was when I buried my daughter Maria who was only 10 years old at the time. The loss of a child is perhaps the most painful form of grief. Nothing in life prepare you for this painful process. No manual, no book can possibly prepare you to go through this process..


The only thing that has even given us comfort and the wherewithal to survive this loss was God himself. Over the course of several years God has shown us in his word, and through friends he has imparted words of encouragement and reminders that when we die Christ has assured us that heaven would be our final home.


God reminded me that Danny, grandma and little Maria are having the time of their life in heaven. I was also reminded that time does heal all painful wounds of grief. Whereas I felt a deep sense of loss with each of these losses there did come a day where I was able to have a smile on my face as I reflected on the memories on the ones who went before me.

Time in a bottle

For we are God's [own] handiwork (His workmanship), recreated in Christ Jesus, [born anew] that we may do those good works which God predestined (planned beforehand) for us [taking paths which He prepared ahead of time], that we should walk in them [living the good life which He prearranged and made ready for us to live]. Ephesians 2: 10

Jim Croce was one of my favorite artists when I was in high school. The song that I especially liked was 'If I could save time in a bottle'.  At the time I heard that song I was facing many life decisions as a young person. What do I do after high school? Where should I go to college? What kind of career will I have? Who should I marry?  These decisions were hard to think about and in someways I just wanted to freeze time and stay just he way I was at the time.  Alas, that isn't the way it works. 

It is as though from the time we are born we are placed on a moving sidewalk where he pass through phases of life. There are moments we wished the sidewalk would move slower so we could savor the moment and there were moments where we  wish it would go faster to escape those unbearable moments. At times there were even moments we wished to go in reverse so we could re-capture the moments. As we are riding this moving sidewalk occasionally we glance up to notice other's crying as loved ones they thought would be with them on this journey would hop off waving a final goodbye. Tears are staining the faces of the ones still on the sidewalk while smiles erupt on the faces of those who's journey has ended.

Time has a way of healing our brokenness. It has a way of lessening the pain we feel toward our losses. As each new scenic wonder comes upon us we are drawn to those moments. Instead of looking back at the empty spot our love one stepped off we are drawn to the present moments that captivate us.The birth of a child. The marriage of a daughter. Rediscovering the love of your life. Going on a short term missions trip.  All of these bring renewed excitement into our lives.

Living in the present helps us to discover the joys of living. Thanking God for the memories of our loved ones who have left us and then focusing on those who are with us gives us a reason to keep on living. Tonight, I decided to stay home and have a movie night with my son.  We ordered Jet's pizza and watched the Planet of the Apes. I also called my wife who stayed several days later with her family than I could to wish her a happy new year. It is our loved ones who are  here  that give us a reason to enjoy life and to live.  

No longer in high school I have come to appreciate the lyrics to Jim Croce's song. As I continue on the moving sidewalk I will continue to be drawn to the present moments that give me the joy of living.