Enjoy this lighthearted story written one year ago

                                   It was a day after Christmas in the land of no snow
The day after Christmas we had record setting temperatures well into the low 50’s in the land of no snow. In a land that was by any other year was use to record setting lows, trips to the emergency room for frost bite, and kids getting new winter coats because they wore out the ones they wore the year before. Fathers and sons were looking forward to trying out their new Ferrari fast snow mobiles and good Samaritan neighbors often looked forward to being neighborly by blowing out the driveways of people of lesser means who only had a single shovel. On those rare occasions when Paul the weather guy was correct in his weather prediction those with just a simple shovel would rise early in the morning only to find their neighbor had snow blown half of his driveway. That was the way it was in the land of snow and when this travesty of warm California like temperatures started occurring people found it hard to find other ways of being neighborly. Minnesotans are a very passive bunch and would often rather do something to befriend someone than spend an hour chatting with them.

The guys at the VFW hall who went snow chasing came back empty handed. They drove as far west as New Mexico before they began seeing flakes before deciding that they ought to go back home before their wives and girl friends started to miss them. The day after Christmas was meant as a day where dad’s took their kids sledding at the nearest hill. It was a day of climbing up the hills pulling their kids in their sleds and riding down with them if they are young. It was a day where all the dads wished they had taken better care of themselves and wondering if climbing the hill would bring on a massive coronary. The day after Christmas was meant to be a day of drinking hot cocoa and putting another log on the fire and sharing memories of Christmas’s in by-gone era when the two of you were small. It was not meant going out side changing fuses in the Christmas lights because the rain had shorted out the lights.

Most families in these parts had already packed away their summer clothing in October and when Cam the weather guy from CC0 reported more balmy weather they were left to look at all their sweaters and thick sweat shirts and wondering what they had to wear. In one household William was so determined to take advantage of the warm weather that he ran downstairs to tear into the box marked summer clothes which was at the very bottom of the neatly arranged stack that took his wife days to organize.

Families in the land of no snow began to see this as a new pattern of weather. They began to adapt by filling their gas grills with propane and getting the garden hoses out and attempting to get their grass out of dormancy. The woman in town got together and disperse any seeds they had between them to see if they could grow something in this much improve growing climate.

Kids were adapting very nicely and in fact enjoyed going outdoors not having to bundle up so tight with several layers of clothing. Through the front window mom’s and dad’s could watch as they were riding the bikes they got for Christmas and laughing with their friends. Some were playing catch while throwing the football with their dad in the front yard. Little Tommy Thatchard was running through the sprinkler his mom put out for him. Even the dogs got into the act as they retrieve the ball that was thrown by their master in a endless game of catch.

The day after Christmas was no retailer’s dream as people began returning the winter coats they receive for Christmas thinking that they no longer needed these thick coats with the changing California like weather that until now they could only dream about. Retailers had only begun putting up the signs for spring season wear, but they had no spring clothing to sell to these people returning their coats. After all, the spring clothing wasn’t due in until February.

With no snow in the forecast home owners who were counting on snow to hold their manger scenes down were out of luck. Whenever a northwesterly wind came up each of these manger figurines would blow over as though nature was having fun bowling. Mark, who lived in the blue house across the street from ours had a very frustrating time with his collapsing manger scene until he decided to give up setting it up until the winds had passed over.

Down at the Realtor’s office, Angela, a registered and licensed realtor was fielding phone calls from speculators wanting to cash in on what they think would become new ocean front property when property west of the Minnesota border would collapse into the ocean as a result of predicted tsunami’s and earthquakes. Overnight small towns near the border saw sky rocketing land values. Folks like Avis and Arlen Stankey were made instant millionaires when they sold their small plat of land on E Bay. Lutheran Pastors were so concerned about this instant wealth that they began delivering sermons on the dangers of greed.

All good things must come to an end in the land of no snow. That night we watched Cam the weather guy from CC0 report on a major snow storm moving in from Colorado. He described the epic cold that would follow with a path of 10 foot snow drifts. The guys from the VFW lodge who went snow chasing were buying each other a round of drinks while patting themselves on their backs because they accomplished their mission after all.

The good Samaritan neighbors were ecstatic at the prospects of helping their less fortunate shovel poor neighbors. Those who took their winter coats back to the store thinking we were about to be the new California were disappointed and were left to wear their old worn out winter coat with the tear in the sleeve. Retailers were having a heyday as they sell the remaining stock of warm winter clothing. Wives were looking forward to making hot cocoa and reading their novel by the fire while the snow blew outside. Children that night were all heard praying to God to grant them a snow day so they could stay home and play. What they didn’t know was how the school administrators were praying that everything will work out logistically and that the roads would get plowed so school could be held. I am sure the good Lord was up there smiling wondering which prayer to answer.

There is a certain badge of honor to living in this land. Unless you grew up on a farm you very rarely saw a snow day. Almost as though the folks from the land of snow enjoyed gloating to their neighbors to the south and west how strong they are because they made it to work and school despite the high snow drifts and treacherous roads. They would laugh at the reports from other states when everything shut down when the temperature dropped below 32 degrees.

The unseasonably warm weather in the land of no snow was merely a blip on the radar. Almost like God decided to have a laugh by shifting the weather patterns around and watching people struggle as they try to adapt to something they are not accustomed to this time of the year. So when the snow fell and the temperatures dip people were relieved in the land of snow. Now they get their bragging rights back about how they survived the great blizzard of 011.
Todd Gabrielson

Seeking a new balance in a family who has suffered the loss of a child

Compassionate friends is another support group that families who have suffered the loss of a child can attend to gain emotional support and understanding. I have included this 55 minute webinar on my blog as a educational tool to teach you  about how losing a child can effect the family. Compassionate friends has helped thousands of families every year to recover from the throes of grief. I encourage you to listen to this informative webinar and also encourage you to forward this blog to anyone you may know who has experience the death of a child.

Celebrating Christmas in the midst of grieving

Recently, I listened to the wife of a Pastor share her grief over losing their 12 year old son, Conner, to a sudden unexpected medical event just 3 1/2 years ago.  Before losing her son she remembers how critical of people she would be who struggled with depression and anxiety disorders. Only after she lost her son did she truly understand why people struggle with these problems.Her husband remembers not really understanding the significance of  losing a child even though he had counseled many couples who did suffer this type of loss  Only when he lost Conner did he suddenly understand  the  pain of losing a child.

His wife describes her grief as though she had been thrown into a very deep, cavernous pit and looking up and asking God 'why us'. She describes how she couldn't sing certain praise songs in church that had the phrase,'God is good all the time' and thinking that God isn't good all the time because this doesn't feel like love. She remembers well meaning friends tossing her bible verses to cling to that might offer her a glimmer of hope, but in reality what she needed was for someone to climb down into the cavernous pit and sit with her as she worked through the ugly and messy grief process.

 Finally one day she received a phone call from a woman who lost her 17 year old son several years ago. She offered no bible verses, but  instead threw down a long ladder and climbed directly into the dark pit and sat with her as she grappled with her messy grief.

Christmas time is often a painful time for families who struggle over the memories of their deceased child. The surviving children often struggle watching their classmates criticize their siblings and talking all the things they want for Christmas. While their friends are living in a Disney experience these children are forced to experience something most of us do not experience until much later in life.   Instead of experiencing the joys of the Christmas  these  families have been thrown into a dark and cavernous pit where it is very hard to experience the joys that others feel.

Are you willing to throw down a ladder and climb  into the cavernous pit where your grieving friend sits?  This is exactly what they need when grief overtakes them. When you do decide to climb into the pit please be reminded that  the grief process isn't determined by you, but it is determined by the uniqueness of their grief.  Your willingness to walk this grief journey with them will in the end carry intangible rewards as you see full healing take place in their lives. You will experience joy as you watch your friend singing in church  the very song he or she could not sing when grief first entered their life.

May you and your family have a very blessed and joy filled Christmas as we reflect on God's gift to the world which reminds us that no matter what happens in this life God's son is their to help us.